The loss of a great man

I just recently found out about the death of a man I hold close to my heart. It was such a shock and I still don't think I've fully accepted it. Mason was my friend and mentor and influenced my life tremendously. All that I know about retail, fashion, wholesale buying, and managing I owe to him. I never would've opened my own business without the training and confidence in my trade that I recieved from working under such a brilliant man.

Mason was from Damascus, Syria and grew up in the wholesale business. He always spoke of Damascus and its splendor. He made it sound like the streets were lined in gold and surrounded by magnificent buildings. He always said one day he'd take me there to see it's beauty. Mason moved to America on his own right out of High School to attend college in the States. Believe it or not his major was in Electric Engineering. He later went on to open the most successful Boutique business in NW Arkansas. I was blessed enough to work with him for 7 years as his business grew and prospered. He had such an amazing talent and I could've only dreamed to be the success he was.

He wasn't only an amazing mentor and boss but a great friend. Always happy and cracking jokes he had the best personality. Having to put in my notice and leave his side was one of the hardest moments I can remember. I was getting married and moving here, to Illinois. My husband and I were just looking at our wedding pictures and came across a picture of Mason standing tall with us at our reception. I guess that's what inspired this blog. I often wonder where I would be if my husband and I had gotten to stay in Arkansas and I continued working for him. Who knows?

A couple of years ago he was diagnosed with brain cancer and last week he lost the battle.

Mason will forever be in my heart and I will always consider him the man who changed my life. You will be missed, Mason!!

Bed Rest: Day 5

Well....still in bed.

I'm so over television...something I never thought I would say. There's just nothing good to watch during the day and by the time my shows come on at night I'm over it.

I started reading a book....again, not normal for me but I'm getting desperate.

Yesterday my husband asked me what was on my agenda for the day. He said "So, do you have a big cross-word puzzle to solve at noon?" Smart ass.

My friends have been very sweet. They've brought me meals and treats. They've all offered to go get me anything I need. In case I'm stuck here longer I'm waiting to take them up on those offers. It could get ugly if I cash those in too early and end up having an extended stay in bed. I can't solely count on my husband for help....he just doesn't get it.

My poor dogs don't understand why I'm not getting up and playing with them. My husband decided that they are officially on bed rest now too because all they do is lay around in the bedroom with me. Now I'm promoting doggie laziness and obesity. Great.

I think I'm gonna take a shower today so that's pretty exciting. This and going to the bathroom are the two things I'm allowed to do. Also exciting. Having a functioning bowel is quite the accomplishment these days.

Well, I'm afraid that's as good as it gets for now. If I do anything crazy like tackle that cross-word puzzle I'll make sure and let you know!

Long time, no blog...

So, it's been forever since I wrote anything but blogging has been the last thing on my mind these days. I'm pregnant!! Wow...still a little weird. I'm at 10 weeks an counting and thankfully past the nausea. That sure was brutal! My husband and I have been trying for a while and were getting frustrated when it was happening for everyone around us but not working for us. You just never know what's gonna happen. We had started some infertility treatments and were really hoping we wouldn't have to go too far into it...thankfully we didn't.

It's been a very different experience for me. First of all, I never thought I wanted kids. For most of my life and the majority of my marraige my husband and I didn't think we wanted children. We were so focused on our careers that we didn't have time or room for anything else. Over the last 2-3 years we began to change our minds and now it's all we want. Crazy how that happens!

Ufortunately, I've had some minor complications. I have what's called low-lying placenta previa. In most cases it fixes itself so it should be fine. Until then, I'm on bed rest. Ugh. Talk about boring. I guess I'll have plenty of time to blog now, huh? This is really no surprise since, medically, I've always done things the hard way. I don't think I've ever had any kind of medical experience where something didn't go awry. I've got this!

Until next time (probably tomorrow) I bid you adieu!

Catching Up

As I mentioned in my last blog, I went home to Arkansas a couple of weeks ago for a few days. My Aunt has just recently had bypass surgery so I went to help her out while she's recovering. It killed me every time I saw her cough or even move for that matter. It looked so painful but thankfully she is doing well and recovery seems to be going as it should.

I've been going home a lot lately because spending time with my family is so important to me and I love seeing how much my nephew has grown since I saw him last.

My sweet Nephew

But this time I got another bonus. My best girlfriend from high school was also in town and so we made plans to get together with our other two friends and catch up. We had so much fun! I loved getting to know who they are today but I was so pleased to see that they haven't changed a bit! It was always the four of us together in school. Especially me and Erin. You would never see one of us without the other. We had a blast getting to know each other again. I'm so proud of who they have all become.

Kym, Becky, Me, and Erin
Project Graduation 1994

February 2010 (Didn't get the pic taken before Becky left)

Great memories from High School with these girls:

1. Scorching in the sun at Cheerleading Camp
2. Hanging out in Kym's gym behind her house practicing and gossiping (oh, if those walls could talk!)
3. Breaking my tail bone from endless falls off of pyramids and tumbling spills
4. Decorating the boys sweaty, stinky locker rooms before games
5. Watching Kym tumble at Basketball games
6. Watching Becky kick butt at Powder Puff games
7. Listening to Erin talk about her Dooney and Burke bag

Oh, those were the days!!!

Not what I thought

I guess since I have nothing better to do at work, I'll use my time here to write about how I have nothing to do. I was really excited about this job for about two weeks. During those weeks, I was attempting to train myself and learn about the furniture business. I considered it a new opportunity and hoped it would be a stepping stone to a new exciting time in my life. Not so much.

After week 2, I started to hear all the gossip going on around me and learned that things aren't going well for the company. We have since been taken over by corporate and the previous owner, the one who hired me a month ago, is no longer part of the company. All agreements and contracts I had with him are now null and void and we are officially under corporate control. Living with the by-the-book-with-no-room-for-change-and-please-keep-your-own-individualism-to-yourself-while-your-at-work attitude. Fun stuff.

I've now lost my salary, my at-work freedom, and if I stay, my dignity. Right? Hmmm...what to do? Honestly, I don't see the store staying open for much longer so I've decided to stay here and work fewer hours until they close their doors. Might as well. At least it's a little money for a while. I can use my free time to look for yet another job. Ugh!!

That's my first frustration. My second is that this week I've discovered that pretty much EVERYONE I KNOW is pregnant. My friends and I are all trying to get pregnant right now and it has worked for everyone but me. As a matter of fact, it only took ONE TRY for all of them. Meanwhile, my husband and I have been trying longer and nothing. Another reason it makes me angry is because I have been married for 8 years and they've all been married for about a minute!! Haven't my husband and I put in the time?? Haven't we earned the right to have children first???!!! Ok, I know that's not how it works but still. Can you tell I'm frustrated?

Well that's my bitch for the day. I'm trying to channel my patience this week. The good news is that I get to go home to Arkansas and see my family tomorrow. Woo hoo!!

Happy Days

My sister tagged me to list 10 things that make me happy so here it goes...



1. Having the day off on a rainy, gloomy day. I love cuddling up on the couch and listening to a thunderstorm.



2. A clean house. A clean house makes me feel comfortable and cozy. Although it's rare because my dogs drool and shed constantly. I would literally have to vaccum, mop, and dust every day to really feel like my house is clean.



3. Seeing results after I finish a project. I'm a very visual person. I love to clean, organize, and decorate because of the feeling it gives me when I'm done and I get to step back and look at the finished product.



4. Spending time with my family. Living so far away from all of them is hard on me. Time together is cherished.



5. Getting a compliment from a complete stranger. It's not something that happens often and it's not something that they owe me so I know it's sincere.



6. Laughing. The best medicine ever!



7. Singing. If I need to be up-lifted all I have to do is put in one of my favorite CD's and sing away.



8. Sleeping. I have never been a morning person and sleeping-in is my favorite thing to do. I used to let people make me feel bad about it. They would tell me that I've "slept the day away" or "I'll have plenty of time to sleep when I'm dead" but now I don't let it get to me. I'm ok with loving sleep so they should be too.

9. My dogs. I've never not had a dog. I just love animals and my dogs are like my children. It's such a good feeling to come home to such a loving being. No matter what, they're always happy to see me and they always put a smile on my face.

10. My husband. Even after 10 years I still can't wait to see him walk through the door.

New Beginnings

I'm already very grateful for 2010. I know I shouldn't jump the gun but, I have a good feeling.

My year started off at a friends house where a bunch of us got together in our pajamas and played games while welcoming the new year. Just after midnight we played a game called Left, Right, Center that involves betting and the pot grew to $72. I won!!! Talk about a good start to the new year!

We spent the next day with friends eating left-overs and watching movies (I don't recommend "All About Steve" with Sandra Bullock....what was she thinking?!!). Very relaxing.

The following day my girlfriends and I went to look at a new women's shelter that is opening in our home town. The home is for pregnant women that have no where to go and no one to turn to. They house these women for their full pregnancy and the 3 months following while educating them and helping them to get on their feet. The goal is to help them become self sufficient so they can support themselves and become productive members of society without either going back into a bad environment or drawing welfare forever. My girls and I are sponsoring a room. We get full reign on decorating and stocking the main bathroom that will be shared by 3 women. It was very inspirational to go in and see the home and talk with the woman who is heading up the project. Some people amaze me! Anyway, this was a great day because we get to give back by setting these women up for success....it's a good feeling.

Then, 2 days later, I started my new job. This has been quite a feat for me. Last year left me doubting myself and my abilities. After I closed my business I had no idea what I wanted to do. My husband asked me continuously what I wanted to do next and for months I couldn't answer him. I realize now it's because I was in mourning. It's hard to replace something like that. Especially if you've dedicated 4 years of your life to it.

But, I did it and I really think I'm gonna enjoy it. It's only been two days and I have A LOT more training to do but it's different and new and fresh. Just what I needed in 2010!

So, as I sit here on my new laptop (the new job was a great excuse to get one!) excited about my new opportunities I'm thinking this is the year of new beginnings. Bring it on!!!